Monday, January 28, 2019

About the Book

Title: The Lost Art of Relationship

Author: Dan Chrystal

Genre: Christian non-fiction, Christian living

Release date: October 15, 2018

Relationship is a journey of discovery—a lost art. In this generation, it has become challenging to deepen and grow personal relationships with each other. Our technology-flooded environment has left many with limited relational experience and a fear of face-to-face connection and meeting new people.

The church has done a decent job of helping people understand the need and importance of a relationship with God, but what about with each other? At the heart of every man, woman, and child is the need for connection—for relationships with people who love them for who they are.

In The Lost Art of Relationship, Dan Chrystal tackles the heart of relationship based on the time-honored instruction to “love your neighbor as you love yourself.” But what does that mean? How do we live out this odd instruction? Who is my neighbor, anyway? What makes relationships healthy, and what makes them fail? Through Dan’s personal stories and difficult life lessons, readers will come away encouraged, inspired, and motivated to love the people in their life more fully. If you desire deep and meaningful connections, now is the time to discover the lost art of relationship.

About the Author

Dan Chrystal has over twenty-three years of ministry and relationship experience. He serves as a pastor for Bayside Church Granite Bay, under the dynamic leadership of founding pastor, Ray Johnston. Dan is a vibrant speaker and a dedicated life, career, and couple’s coach. He holds an MBA in executive leadership from Kaplan University (now Purdue Global University) and is currently studying law at Concord Law School. His extensive ministry background has taken him all over the country, from the east coast to the west, where he has served in varying capacities, including Lead Pastor, Administrative Pastor, Associate Pastor, Worship Leader, and Youth Pastor. An avid student of relationship, Dan is passionate about helping others to love their neighbors as themselves.

“Choose a good reputation over great riches.” (Proverbs 22:1)

Guest post from Dan

For two years, I experienced what many would call a “wilderness experience.” I truly felt forgotten. I had spent twenty years in various aspects of church work having met and coached hundreds of people, and I still felt like I didn’t truly understand why I was put on this earth. I have moved nine times in my adult life. Everywhere I’ve lived, I had to start over—at work, home, schools for kids, and especially in relationship with others.

The last move was different. This time I was no longer looking to connect simply for the sake of connecting. There was a purpose for connection that was brewing inside me. That purpose became the driving force of my life and remains that way today. In fact, it consumes my thought life, relationships, ministry, and every aspect of what I do, think, and say.

Connecting with others has been a part of my life wherever I have gone. This came from watching my mom over many years meet, talk to, and befriend hundreds of people. At her funeral, I had just about that many tell me “thank you” for allowing my mom to be a part of their lives—how she encouraged them and truly got to know them for who they are.

During my two-year “wilderness” period, there was a realization that over all the moves, restarts, connections, coffee appointments, coaching, lunches, and dinners with people, I was learning the essence of what I believe we are called, or actually commanded, to do by Jesus. Such a simple sentence, “Love your neighbor as yourself.” However, it is one of the most difficult things to live out every day. Let’s face it; relationships are messy. They can be downright frustrating at times, but they are a necessary part of life, and the second most important thing to God.

I am by no means an “expert” in relationship. I am and always will be a student of it. I have watched relationships thrive, survive, and some fall away. There are so many divisions that come between us, and during those two years of struggling with my purpose, it became clear—God has designed, purposed, and prepared me to help others discover what it means to love your neighbor as yourself. I am not perfect at this. As a matter of fact, I struggle—sometimes daily. That is what sparked the writing of this book. I have found there is an artto relationship. For most, it is a lost art, one that can be rediscovered. I would love it if you would join me in discovering The Lost Art of Relationship.

The title of this book had me a little uncomfortable. I am not good at developing relationships and very rarely let anyone in my little circle . It is all a matter of trust for me, so I began this book with an open heart ready to receive some words from God . It didn't take me long to get my first "Are you paying attention to me Deana?, from God. " Every relationship needs to be mutual; most of the time, we need to work hard at maintaining healthy relationships; and some of the most beneficial relationships can happen through tragic circumstances." Well that smacked me right in the face and I sat a little straighter realizing that I have developed a very special relationship from tragedy.

We all need relationships and sometimes if we pay attention, we will see someone who is lonely or hurting that could use a friend. I have always been the type that if I see someone crying I will stop to see if they need help. It is easy sometimes for me to reach out, but so difficult to let others try to help me.

When I was younger I was bullied everyday in school. My dad was a pastor and He was extremely strict. The kids at school made fun of my clothes, my hair or just anything to make me cry and believe that I wasn't good enough. Over the years relationships became very hard for me. I love how the author goes into details about being considerate of others feelings. We may take their silence to mean they don't want to talk, but it could be they just need someone close by to feel needed. How many times have we gotten mad at someone that cut us off the road, or stepped in line in front of us? Those little things can stop us from wanting to be friendly, but I have learned that everyone has a bad day.

We need to bring relationships back to where God designed them. He wants us to be His hands and feet. In order to do that we need to build relationships with others to share compassion, forgiveness and love. The author gives great examples of people in the bible who were warned not to judge by their looks or height. I'm sure we are all guilty of using our first impression of someone and writing them off as someone to get to know.

The author has written a book that I find very informative and helpful in relationships. One of the subjects I liked the most was about forgiveness. That word sends shivers done my spine as I deal with this on a regular basis. " Living a life of forgiveness has its own side effects that are much more beneficial to us-they are sweetness, happiness, and joy." I am still a work in progress but I so desire to have better relationships with others and learn to forgive quickly.

Each chapter is filled with different subjects like, honesty, trust and love. I loved how he summed everything up with this, " I hope you will begin to unearth the lost commandment, to love others as you love yourself." "When you do, may you start to live a fulfilled, abundant life through your relationship with God and your relationships with others."

I received a copy of this book from Celebrate Lit. The review is my own opinion.